Aracnideo
0/0 Germ
It's better to be a healthy rich person than a sick poor one
Posts: 2
Favorite Card: Aurelia, the Warleader
Color Alignment: White, Red
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Post by Aracnideo on Jan 11, 2024 13:32:33 GMT
Hello everyone. I have been lurking in this forum for a while now, but now I need opinions. I'm designing a set with monocolor mechanics, each color having a single specific theme (as most sets do). I would love opinions on balance, on playability, on clearity of the wording and so on. Any advice? Thank you! |
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Post by vizionarius on Jan 11, 2024 20:01:59 GMT
Hello! I don't often click on the "Starting Projects" forum, but here we are. below is my feedback, with links to examples that make use of my suggested wordings, with "|" as separators between links. Swift Judgment
This is a clean and easy-to understand ability, I like it. Just some wording adjustment on the ability: " You may cast this spell | as though it had flash | for its swift judgment cost | if it targets a | permanent with a counter on it." You can then have this wording for referencing it being cast: " Whenever you pay | a spell's swift judgment cost, ..." Vary
This is a bit more complicated of an ability, but I find it interesting. Wording adjustment: " You may pay an additional [cost] as you cast this spell. If you do, | reveal cards from the top of your library until you reveal a | permanent card. | Exile that card | enspiriting | this spell, | then shuffle. | This spell | has | the first ability | of any card | enspiriting it." The wording "the first ability" is new, but it makes sense in how Magic terminology is constructed. I created a new term called "enspiriting," taking haunt as a template for it. Feel free to change this word to whatever you wish. Along with this, I also recommend changing the name of the ability from vary to something like "enspirit." In any case, a designation word is needed in order to be able to associate which card in exile is tied to which permanent on the battlefield, which becomes especially important with cards like your Soulshift. Note that the last sentence in the ability here is a static ability, which means that it is continually checked and updated based on the current state. So if the enspiriting card changes, so will the permanent's ability that is gained. In the comprehensive rules for vary, it would need to be stated that if a card with no abilities is enspiriting a permanent, then it just grants no abilities. But this is not needed in the reminder on the card. As a recommendation, I think it would be a little underwhelming to hit a land with this (especially basic lands). May be better to just have it hit nonland permanent cards or | cards that share a card type | with the spell? Note that basic lands have an intrinsic ability, even if it's not stated on the card. Also note that if a permanent spell gains an ability, it retains it as it becomes a permanent, so your ability works as expected, but there might be the need to update rule 400.7a slightly (or to add it to the comprehensive rules of vary) to also have spells keep designations as they become permanents. The wording on Soulshift is a little confusing, but I think I get what you want it to do. New wording: " Reveal cards from the top of your library until you reveal a | permanent card. | Exile that card | enspiriting | an enspirited creature | you control, | then shuffle all other cards | enspiriting that creature | into your library. | Draw a card." Note that when swapping of cards between zones like this is done, the term "exchange" is not used. Exchange is used only in three scenarios: 1) When control (or ownership in ante) of some object is exchanged between players (like cards or permanents); 2) When it's one value being exchanged with another value (like exchanging power of two creatures or life totals); and 3) When the complete contents of two zones is exchanged (like hand and library). ... to be continued... this took longer than expected so far. |
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Post by vizionarius on Jan 11, 2024 23:49:34 GMT
JinxInteresting to have a counter that can go on any target (permanents or players). Adding "slap" before it feels off to me, especially if it's combined with a numeric value for jinx as well. I think this is most similar to support, which is just one word. I think you could just have "jinx 1" or "jinx 2," since jinx is also a verb. (It also would make it sounds less like you are hitting a Pokémon.) Updated reminder: "Jinx 1 (Put a jinx counter on up to one target.)" or, for more than 1, "Jinx 2 (Put a jinx counter on each of up to two targets.)" TormentI like this; it reminds me of clash. I would use it closer to how you do in Novice of Ineptitude, specifically, "torment target opponent," as opposed to how you have it used in Duel of Incompetents. Note that I changed "an opponent" to "target opponent" to better match the reminder that you have. I agree that this should in fact target, since it can deal damage. Regarding the wording, the use of the semantically plural 'your' is done as follows (there is only one example that I know of so far in Magic for this): " You and target opponent each reveal the top card of your library. | Then if | the revealed | cards have | different mana values, | this | source deals damage | to that opponent | equal to the difference." Last StrikeClean and straightforward; no other comments. LazinessHaha, good one! Flavorful. Wording recommendation: " At the beginning of your end step, if | this creature | didn't attack this turn | and if | it doesn't have | summoning sickness, | put a +1/+1 counter on it. | It becomes lazy | until your next turn." With laziness more than one, you'd have "At the beginning of your end step, if this creature didn't attack this turn and if it doesn't have summoning sickness, put [N] +1/+1 counters on it. It becomes lazy until your next turn." With the addition of "it becomes lazy," which is a designation, you are able to check later on when something "becomes lazy," like in Cathedral Thief: " Whenever a creature you control becomes | lazy, | put a +1/+1 counter on Cathedral Thief. | This ability triggers only once each turn." Alright, hope this helps!
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Aracnideo
0/0 Germ
It's better to be a healthy rich person than a sick poor one
Posts: 2
Favorite Card: Aurelia, the Warleader
Color Alignment: White, Red
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Post by Aracnideo on Jan 12, 2024 2:11:51 GMT
My brother, you helped a lot! thank you so much. I'll get into all of that asap.
And about playability, balance, anyone has any insight? Mind testing, Torment seems to be potentially broken tbh.
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Post by vizionarius on Jan 12, 2024 22:28:38 GMT
Glad it's helpful!
For torment, my concern is that you can do a test with 1 torment card, then hold back the rest until you can get a ton of damage in. Also, it benefits you playing with both very low as well as very high cost cards. Maybe play with the idea of only dealing damage if your card is the higher cost? Also, in order to prevent multiple torments to deal the same damage (it feels bad for you if you're getting 0 damage for the whole turn, and feels bad for the opponent if you do a ton of damage with each in a turn), you can either mill the top card instead of just revealing it, or put it on the botton of the deck after reveal. This way, tormenting multiple times in a turn is no longer deterministic, and it becomes a lot more difficult to set up multiple torments to hit for a lot. I wouldn't go as far as to force a shuffle, though.
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