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Post by sdfkjgh on Apr 17, 2019 18:32:15 GMT
In honor of Hump Day, I decided to start a thread based on an idea I had a few days ago:
Lines of Magic play that sound like sex acts.
Whether it be whipping your opponent's Elephant, or asphyxiating someone's mother, or lacing your Bloom Tender*, I wanna hear all the kinkiest things that've happened to you in a game of Magic!
*Bloom Tender: How dare you, sir! I'll have you know, I'm a happily married Elf, and would never do such shameless acts without my husband! |
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Post by Tesagk on Apr 17, 2019 19:44:31 GMT
I mean, I took a meat-on-meat pounding earlier today in Arena. Does that count?
Edit: Proof fail, screenshot was never saved.
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Post by sdfkjgh on Apr 20, 2019 7:30:08 GMT
Tesagk: Details, man; need details.
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Post by sdfkjgh on Apr 20, 2019 7:33:33 GMT
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Post by voltaic-qui on Apr 20, 2019 16:42:55 GMT
Every shockland is a vagina metaphor
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Post by melono on Apr 20, 2019 16:46:06 GMT
I'm mildly disappointed Stroke you to death isn't Deathstroke. |
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Post by sdfkjgh on Apr 20, 2019 18:35:38 GMT
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Telim'Tor
0/0 Germ
Posts: 18
Favorite Card: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]ARTIFACT JANK!!![/font]
Favorite Set: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]Chronicles, Homelands[/font]
Color Alignment: Red
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Post by Telim'Tor on Apr 27, 2019 17:16:13 GMT
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Post by Idea on May 4, 2019 17:22:36 GMT
I mean...pretty much everything is a sex act, or at least some sexual implication, in the 21st century if you think about it in that context. From a random pile of flavor text, a few examples:
While Kaya is guildmaster, Teysa waits patiently at the center of the Orzhov web of power
-Teyza Karlov
Appearantly she likes some kinky roleplay
"Now that I've dealt with your little toys, I can focus on the real problem: you."
-Chandra Nalaar, to Dovin Baan
-Chandra's Pyrohelix
Well, ain't she determined in bed. Even willing to put up with Dovin's toys.
Someone drops their pants:
"Fall back! You are no match for this."
-Samut
-Invading Manticore
The mage looked within and realized there was still one piece of fuel to burn
-Heartfire
Need I explain this one?
"The Eternals had to endure Amonkhet's five trials. Let's see if they can pass the Trial of Ravnica."
-Jace Beleren
-Wardscale Crocodile
What trial might that be..oh...
Shadows coiled around the witness's mind. Then the moment vanished, leaving only the sting of its loss
-Davriel's Shadowgue
Tell me you can't see that line in an "adult novel".
With the harvest of Domri's spark, the Elderspell began to fuel Bolas's ascension to godhood.
-Spark Harvest
Yes...his "spark" was "harvested"
Maybe I'll add some more if I find a really, really good one
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Post by sdfkjgh on May 4, 2019 22:21:30 GMT
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Post by Idea on May 4, 2019 22:29:54 GMT
Thank you, thank you *bows* |
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