Telim'Tor
0/0 Germ
Posts: 18
Favorite Card: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]ARTIFACT JANK!!![/font]
Favorite Set: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]Chronicles, Homelands[/font]
Color Alignment: Red
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Post by Telim'Tor on Mar 21, 2019 16:38:54 GMT
Phew! Thanks to recruit Daij_Djan’s last-second intervention, I was able to slaughter those filthy long-ears and make my escape! Ral: Dude, they were offering you food, shelter, and a guide through their territory, and you murdered every single one of them. You even went out of your way to kill all the babies, salt their cropfields, and poison their water supply! Well, how was I supposed to know what they were saying? I couldn’t understand that gobbledygook language they were speaking! Ral: THEY WERE SPEAKING YOUR LANGUAGE! JUST LIKE I’M DOING RIGHT NOW, YOU GENOCIDAL DIPSHIT! I only understand the language of battle! Just like recruit Daij_Djan. Well done, good sir! Candidate passes! But only just barely. Next time, make your submission much sooner. Ral: Yeah. That way, he wouldn’t have had as much time to commit so many war crimes! Quiet, you. Ral: You’re lucky this plane doesn’t have a Geneva Convention equivalent. Teferi: Him & Urza, man. GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SIGHT, YOU HOMELAND-VANISHING خنزير الماعز حمار الأبله!!! Teferi: You were right, Ral. This guy IS amusingly terrible! Ral: Dude, he senselessly slaughtered an entire Elfhame! Teferi: Look at you, getting all squeamish! Better not let your dady hear you caring so much, he might just bite your head off. LEAVE NOW, OR THEY WON’T FIND A BODY!!! Teferi: I GO WHERE I WANT, WHEN I WANT, AND I LEAVE CHRONAL BACKUPS IN MY WAKE! JUST TRY SOMETHING, LITTLE MAN, THE ENTIRETY OF TIME WILL ME MOBILIZED AGAINST YOU!!! Ral: Can we please get on with it?! How the hell did I end up being the voice of reason?! Right. After my harrowing escape from those hostile Elves-- Teferi: People are generally hostile when you shoot first! --I found myself in need of a hasty, antithetical getaway, as I was trapped in a Faerie hive, with all the former occupants dead-- Ral: Are you sure you didn’t kill them? --and the walls closing in. So, I want you all to build me a Vintage-legal and -viable, non-Faerie,   aggro deck, with sideboard. Now, I’m a little short on mana bonds at the moment, so the converted mana cost of the entire deck (i.e. the sum total of the cmcs of each card in the deck and sideboard) can’t be greater than 90. You have three weeks, at the end of which will be another challenge, submissions or no. It’s time I stop coddling you all with extra time, and keep to the posted schedule!
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temawimag
2/2 Zombie
Posts: 137
Favorite Card: Elite Arcanist
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Post by temawimag on Mar 21, 2019 20:20:46 GMT
45 Relentless Rats
15 Swamps
Sideboard:
10 Islands
1 Time Warp
4 Evacuation
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Post by fluffydeathbringer on Mar 22, 2019 8:05:47 GMT
well, sir, we've got good news and bad news
the bad news is that those dang faeries made off with half the sideboard
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Telim'Tor
0/0 Germ
Posts: 18
Favorite Card: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]ARTIFACT JANK!!![/font]
Favorite Set: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]Chronicles, Homelands[/font]
Color Alignment: Red
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Post by Telim'Tor on Mar 22, 2019 8:52:18 GMT
fluffydeathbringer: You need to check your math again, Soldier! Even with your severely reduced sideboard, your deck's total cmc is 100, 10 points above the required cutoff. Try again. And this time, provide a full 15 sideboard!
temawimag: And YOUR attempt to be cute clocks in at 160! It's lke you're not even trying!Ral: Hey, maybe don't constantly berate the people who you're trying to recruit to be your cannon fodder? Isn't their potential posistion enough of an insult? Quiet, you. Can't you see their eagerness for the glory of victorious battle that's guaranteed within my illustrious ranks? I'm merely hammering out their weaknesses!Ral: I saw your last abortive attempt at blacksmithing. The parts of him that survived the self-immolation are still in therapy, physical and mental, to this very day! We even had to fabricate an entire multiversal invasion as a cover story, so he wouldn't find out that he set himself on fire, blew up his high school, and killed all his friends, because that would completely break him again!Teferi: Are you guys talking about me? Ral: Nah, man. It's some other guy who was on fire for over five years. Teferi: Oh, cool. It's amazing how often that happens… Ral: You see? He's already a completely broken man, if he ever found out the truth, it'd kill him! And it's all your fault for pushing him beyond his breaking point, then haranguing him for not going any further! Enough! Private ibn-Zhalfir's failure will NOT be repeated by my new recruits, AND THAT'S AN ORDER, TROOPS! NOW GIMME A 'SIR, YES SIR!', AND A BETTER ATTEMPT AT DECKBUILDING TO THE SPECIFIED PARAMETERS! DISMISSED!!
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Post by fluffydeathbringer on Mar 22, 2019 11:58:37 GMT
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Telim'Tor
0/0 Germ
Posts: 18
Favorite Card: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]ARTIFACT JANK!!![/font]
Favorite Set: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]Chronicles, Homelands[/font]
Color Alignment: Red
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Post by Telim'Tor on Mar 22, 2019 20:11:34 GMT
fluffydeathbringer: 83. Bravo. Once again, you are the current front-runner. At this rate, you should make a fine Colonel some day!
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temawimag
2/2 Zombie
Posts: 137
Favorite Card: Elite Arcanist
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Post by temawimag on Mar 22, 2019 21:36:41 GMT
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Telim'Tor
0/0 Germ
Posts: 18
Favorite Card: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]ARTIFACT JANK!!![/font]
Favorite Set: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]Chronicles, Homelands[/font]
Color Alignment: Red
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Post by Telim'Tor on Mar 24, 2019 6:12:51 GMT
temawimag: IS THIS SOME KIND OF JOKE TO YOU, RECRUIT?! The maximum target for a passing grade is 90. Your revision clocks in at 145! Look at fluffydeathbringer over there. HE managed to come in UNDER-BUDGET! HE is who you should aspire to be! HE is your ideal! HE is who you WILL dream about when you touch yourself at night, ANDTHAT'SANORDER! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!
Perhaps you think you're being funny, submitting a meme deck, then a slight variation on the exact same meme. Perhaps you think you can get away with forgoing Tetsuko Umezawa, Fugitive, the key card to this very archetype, and not have me notice. WELL LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, MAGGOT! I NOTICED! I NOTICED BIG TIME!!!
Fail me one more time, and you are washed out of this man's army!Ral: Still not seeing any problems with driving away potential soldiers when you're so very hurting for more, are we? DISMISSED!!!
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Post by ThatDamnPipsqueak on Mar 28, 2019 0:12:57 GMT
Telim'Tor sir! I attempted to build the most serious UB Vintage deck I could, but a tiny bit of green got into it Sir! I think it still should count, as it is necessary to maintain the ability to actually do well in the format. Here you go for review: UB Death's Shadow tappedout.net/mtg-decks/vintage-shadow-1/The restriction of 90 mana was very difficult, because I wanted to be able to play Street Wraith (which doesn't *really* cost mana, but it has a mana cost), but I think this could actually win some games in the format. |
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Telim'Tor
0/0 Germ
Posts: 18
Favorite Card: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]ARTIFACT JANK!!![/font]
Favorite Set: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]Chronicles, Homelands[/font]
Color Alignment: Red
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Post by Telim'Tor on Mar 28, 2019 3:46:23 GMT
ThatDamnPipsqueak: You test my patience submitting a broken link, pipsqueak. You may have proven your essay-writing chops in the past, but that counts for very little when you're holding in your buddy's guts on the field of battle! I can't even see whether a special dispensation for a splash color is warranted. Come back with a fully viewable decklist, then we'll talk about whether adding a third color violates the terms of the challenge!
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Post by ThatDamnPipsqueak on Mar 28, 2019 7:11:53 GMT
A classic blunder, resulting from faulty technology! The error has been fixed, and the deck is now viewable. I trust it will make your army considerably more potent.
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Telim'Tor
0/0 Germ
Posts: 18
Favorite Card: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]ARTIFACT JANK!!![/font]
Favorite Set: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]Chronicles, Homelands[/font]
Color Alignment: Red
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Post by Telim'Tor on Mar 28, 2019 18:33:33 GMT
ThatDamnPipsqueak: Well. It was quite the emotional rollercoaster going through your decklist, considering all the high-mana cards you included. By the 4-of Null Rod, I was honestly getting a little worried, especially after seeing 2 Gurmag Angler. Yes, In Rod We Trust, but by that point, your total was 72! As I got closer and closer to the end, I kept thinking you weren't going to make it, especially since when you hit 90, I saw that there was still one card slot left, and a 3-of at that! I was all set to mark you as failed until I saw that the card in question is Tormod's Crypt!  ! You bloody bastard, you managed to pull it off! What a goddamn rush! Bra…vo!
For providing such uncertainty and excitement, and because I know that Death's Shadow's biggest weakness is its lack of tramply evasion, not only am I allowing the Special Dispensation for the  splash, I'm also awarding you the coveted Front Runner position for this Challenge! Congratulations.
The rest of you'd better step up your cookies!
Dismissed!
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Post by Daij_Djan on Mar 31, 2019 1:35:07 GMT
Recruit Daij_Djan reporting in, Sir. I have to inform you recruit Wilsson, whom was tasked with carrying the last poisonous frogs, has let them escape and is taking a nap in the puddle over there. Also, may I suggest escaping our dire situation by becoming ninjas? We just have to hide our faces behind our capes, fold our fingers in a weird way and say „Nin-Nin“ to vanish in an explosion of smoke. I've seen a stealthy ninja in bright orange clothes doing it once, so we cannot fail!- “Vin-Nin-Nin“ (Vintage legal)
Creatures (18)
| Spells (26)
| Lands (16)
| Sideboard
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{ Comments} After carrying around the list with me since Tuesday, I've finally found the time to type it down. And I have to say: That total converted mana cost limit was brutal, seriously..! I've redone the numbers multiple times, but this now should add up to 90 nicely. The deck is inspired by a semi-competitive deck concept I've heard players talking about for Legacy back when Yuriko was printed. No idea whether that really worked out well in the end (I intentionally didn't check^^), but the general concept still was the base for this deck.The game plan is simple: Get a cheap creature out, protect it and turn it into a Ninja! I really like how the Ninjas work together nicely with Standstill and how they allow you to reuse your Snapcaster Mages.But I have to admit: I know almost nothing about Vintage at all. The spells in particular basically are a mixture of disruption and format staples balanced to fit the CMC limitation – especially the sideboard really was built merely to be cheap. Normally I would have preferred not adding one as I did last time – but obviously this wouldn't really work this time^^
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Post by gateways7 on Mar 31, 2019 3:28:26 GMT
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Telim'Tor
0/0 Germ
Posts: 18
Favorite Card: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]ARTIFACT JANK!!![/font]
Favorite Set: [font face="Luckiest Guy"]Chronicles, Homelands[/font]
Color Alignment: Red
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Post by Telim'Tor on Mar 31, 2019 23:45:25 GMT
Daij_Djan :  Am I doing it right? I'm not aware of any recruit Wilsson, nor do I remember anything about poison frogs, but I assure you, he will be dealt with most severely for slacking off. Your deck is certainly novel, but this challenge has quite the surplus of submissions, so unfortunately, you're right in the middle of the pack. Ninstill is a sweet combo, though.
gateways7 : 83. You've tied with fluffydeathbringer , both on budget and position. And now you've got me thinking about whether 83 is an absolute lower limit to this challenge.
Good job, recruits. I asked that you all step up your cookies, and you obeyed your general. Proving that you can follow orders goes a long way in this man's army.
Dismissed!
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"When in doubt, do a common." 