Post by sdfkjgh on Jul 12, 2018 23:47:56 GMT
Some things that make life worth living in these dark times:
boldlygowherenodoghasgonebefore on tumblr
Hello, and welcome back to No Reservations II. I would say that my break was a refreshing, relaxing change of pace, but it’s kinda hard to be relaxed when you live under the mad rule of a textbook case of Narcissistic Personality Disorder comorbid with Antisocial Personality Disorder, a.k.a. a sociopathic narcissist. To the entire world, I apologise on behalf of what remains of my country. We can all only live in hope that the Flying Monkeys of the GOP know how much they are not wanted, and that their attitudes are the last vestigial dying throes of major, overt racism, sexism, homophobia, and xenophobia in my country. WE DID NOT WANT THIS; WE DID NOT ASK FOR THIS; WE DO NOT CONDONE THIS!
The administration’s constant evil has gotten me severely depressed lately, and it’s a depression that can only be cured not by drugs, but by regime change.
Enough politics, let’s talk The Reserved List (which is technically still politics). Our tally so far:
Here’s the link to the complete Reserved List.
• 40 cards stay on The Reserved List.
• 49 cards reprinted in Standard.
• 24 cards reprinted in supplemental sets.
•50 cards executed for treason.
• And Dark Ritual is still serving eight consecutive life sentences for crimes against The Mana System.
This gives us a BSQ of 124/164, or 75.(60975)repeating%.
And now, part 1 of 2 of The Dark:
And that’s it for this week. I’m sure glad we could end it on a high note, especially since that high note also marks Standard reprints’ overtaking ofworse living through chemistry’s. Let’s take a look at the tally:
• 41 cards stay on The Reserved List
• 55 cards reprinted in Standard (with, in this issue, Exorcist & Grave Robbers downgraded from
to 
, and Lurker downgraded from to 
).
• 25 cards reprinted in supplemental sets.
•54 cards ignited on contact with chlorine trifluoride.
• And Dark Ritual is still not going anywhere.
This gives us a BSQ of 135/176, or 76.7045% Aaaannd there goes my good feelings about ending on a high note!
Join us next week, where we’ll be finishing up with TheDankDark; and the week after that, when I’ll be showcasing another decklist in Tosche Station. Looking forward to seeing you there! Until then, for Teferi, and all the love & respect for my Editor, Daij_Djan, I’d just like to request a picture of Michael Weatherly in a vase store.9
boldlygowherenodoghasgonebefore on tumblr
Hello, and welcome back to No Reservations II. I would say that my break was a refreshing, relaxing change of pace, but it’s kinda hard to be relaxed when you live under the mad rule of a textbook case of Narcissistic Personality Disorder comorbid with Antisocial Personality Disorder, a.k.a. a sociopathic narcissist. To the entire world, I apologise on behalf of what remains of my country. We can all only live in hope that the Flying Monkeys of the GOP know how much they are not wanted, and that their attitudes are the last vestigial dying throes of major, overt racism, sexism, homophobia, and xenophobia in my country. WE DID NOT WANT THIS; WE DID NOT ASK FOR THIS; WE DO NOT CONDONE THIS!
The administration’s constant evil has gotten me severely depressed lately, and it’s a depression that can only be cured not by drugs, but by regime change.
Enough politics, let’s talk The Reserved List (which is technically still politics). Our tally so far:
Here’s the link to the complete Reserved List.
• 40 cards stay on The Reserved List.
• 49 cards reprinted in Standard.
• 24 cards reprinted in supplemental sets.
•
• And Dark Ritual is still serving eight consecutive life sentences for crimes against The Mana System.
This gives us a BSQ of 124/164, or 75.(60975)repeating%.
And now, part 1 of 2 of The Dark:
{Track 6 on the Dethklok/Magic: the Gathering collaboration album}
City of Shadows 50
Price
City of Shadows is the very first storage land, which means that its pedigree is one of the strongest in the game. I’m not gonna list equivalencies, as it would take too much time, and really, how much would it add? All I need to say is “storage land”, and you’d all prolly understand exactly what I mean. No? Ok, Dreadship Reef. There, you happy?
City of Shadows is pretty safe. The costs mean that, at first, it’s pretty hard to abuse, but the same is true for Everflowing Chalice or Astral Cornucopia1, and they’re ok, right? City of Shadows’ List status is yet another in a looooooooooonng line of overreactions ingrained in The Reserved List.
City of Shadows 50
Price
City of Shadows is the very first storage land, which means that its pedigree is one of the strongest in the game. I’m not gonna list equivalencies, as it would take too much time, and really, how much would it add? All I need to say is “storage land”, and you’d all prolly understand exactly what I mean. No? Ok, Dreadship Reef. There, you happy?
City of Shadows is pretty safe. The costs mean that, at first, it’s pretty hard to abuse, but the same is true for Everflowing Chalice or Astral Cornucopia1, and they’re ok, right? City of Shadows’ List status is yet another in a looooooooooonng line of overreactions ingrained in The Reserved List.
{What do you call a Killing Wave on the tel of Megiddo?}
Cleansing 41
Price
X=1 on the tel of Megiddo.
Yeah, mass LD should never be allowed at such a low cost. Cleansing stays right where it is, because, shocker! WotC got it right this time.
Also, with all this talk of Armageddon, Killing Wave, and Cleansing, I’m sure there’s a Harold McNeill joke in here somewhere!2
Cleansing 41
Price
X=1 on the tel of Megiddo.
Yeah, mass LD should never be allowed at such a low cost. Cleansing stays right where it is, because, shocker! WotC got it right this time.
Also, with all this talk of Armageddon, Killing Wave, and Cleansing, I’m sure there’s a Harold McNeill joke in here somewhere!2
{Tastes like burning}
Eternal Flame51
Price
Why does Eternal Flame hurt you as well? Were they so afraid of having a janky, game-ending spell at cmc 4? Channel/Fireball. And why is it a? Ye gods, I can’t wait til we get to the Second Stage of Design!
Eternal Flame
Price
Why does Eternal Flame hurt you as well? Were they so afraid of having a janky, game-ending spell at cmc 4? Channel/Fireball. And why is it a
? Ye gods, I can’t wait til we get to the Second Stage of Design!{Little Regan hasn’t been herself lately…}
Exorcist 51, downgraded from to , as per Masters Edition III.
Price
”Your mother sews socks that smell!”
Exorcist is a lesson in how to do a hate card properly: narrow, somewhat fragile (if a creature), and limited in how often it can hate on its purview. If the Paladins are ok, then Exorcist should be too.
Exorcist 51, downgraded from
to , as per Masters Edition III.Price
”Your mother sews socks that smell!”
Exorcist is a lesson in how to do a hate card properly: narrow, somewhat fragile (if a creature), and limited in how often it can hate on its purview. If the Paladins are ok, then Exorcist should be too.
{Frankenstein Was A Flesh Golem is my Doom Metal band name}
Frankenstein’s Monster 25; Surprised? See below.
Price
Alright, yes, MaRo has gone on record as saying that Frankenstein’s Monster is a hot mess of confusion-bait, let’s just get that out of the way right away. And yes, I agree with him, for the most part; let’s get that out of the way, too. But, the thing of it is, that’s why we have dice and beads of different colors. And don’t even try to pretend that you’ve never put +1/+1 counters on an animated Gideon, because Beefslab absolutely LOVES packing on MOAR BEEF!
The point I’m trying to make3 is that in a game this customizable, contrary to R&D’s wishes, getting multiple different types of counters on permanents is inevitable, so mebbe it should be, if not embraced, then at least acknowledged.4
So, with all that in mind, Frankenstein’s Monster seems like a perfect Commander card.
Frankenstein’s Monster 25; Surprised? See below.
Price
Alright, yes, MaRo has gone on record as saying that Frankenstein’s Monster is a hot mess of confusion-bait, let’s just get that out of the way right away. And yes, I agree with him, for the most part; let’s get that out of the way, too. But, the thing of it is, that’s why we have dice and beads of different colors. And don’t even try to pretend that you’ve never put +1/+1 counters on an animated Gideon, because Beefslab absolutely LOVES packing on MOAR BEEF!
The point I’m trying to make3 is that in a game this customizable, contrary to R&D’s wishes, getting multiple different types of counters on permanents is inevitable, so mebbe it should be, if not embraced, then at least acknowledged.4
So, with all that in mind, Frankenstein’s Monster seems like a perfect Commander card.
{Well, us Gobbos may have an atrocious Dental Plan, but we more than make up for it with weird, floaty, smoking balls of rock!}
Goblin Wizard 52
Price
Yes, I’ve railed repeatedly against subverting The Mana System; yes, Goblin Wizard, like Aether Vial, does just that; and yes, Aether Vial was a HUGE mistake.5 Are we done with the rote arguments against individual rulings now?
I’d argue that Goblin Wizard is actually safer to reprint in Standard than anywhere else, save Vintage or Legacy! Why? Two reasons, and they both have to do with format speeds, and formats in general. First, most Goblin decks look to killing their opponents by turn 4 at the latest, so Goblin Wizard fails that test. And second, R&D can craft the Standard environment around Goblin Wizard’s reprinting such that it does little to nothing, either by maintaining the Goblins status quo of dead opponents by turn four, or by doing what they did in Dominaria, not having enough Goblins to really make them viable.
Were Goblin Wizard to be reprinted for Commander or Modern, you’d have a nightmare scenario.
Goblin Wizard 52
Price
{Equivalencies of abilities (because, let’s face it, nobody’s impressed by its stats!)}
Aether Vial, as pointed out by Reuben Bresler recently (sorry I can’t remember where in the video it happens).
Price
Eight-and-a-Half Tails
Price
Aether Vial, as pointed out by Reuben Bresler recently (sorry I can’t remember where in the video it happens).
Price
Eight-and-a-Half Tails
Price
Yes, I’ve railed repeatedly against subverting The Mana System; yes, Goblin Wizard, like Aether Vial, does just that; and yes, Aether Vial was a HUGE mistake.5 Are we done with the rote arguments against individual rulings now?
I’d argue that Goblin Wizard is actually safer to reprint in Standard than anywhere else, save Vintage or Legacy! Why? Two reasons, and they both have to do with format speeds, and formats in general. First, most Goblin decks look to killing their opponents by turn 4 at the latest, so Goblin Wizard fails that test. And second, R&D can craft the Standard environment around Goblin Wizard’s reprinting such that it does little to nothing, either by maintaining the Goblins status quo of dead opponents by turn four, or by doing what they did in Dominaria, not having enough Goblins to really make them viable.
Were Goblin Wizard to be reprinted for Commander or Modern, you’d have a nightmare scenario.
{Ok, this one’s actually very flavorful. I gotta give them points for that…}
Grave Robbers 53, downgraded from6 to .
Price
…But a better, more fitting flavor text would be “They’re dead! What do they need it for?” Also, not all grave robbers took only the jewelry.7
Anyway, I hope you can understand my confusion over the rarity of Grave Robbers. They do their vital work, keeping OP graveyard shenannygoats in check, and gaining you some incidental life in the process; nothing to get too excited about. The last two equivalencies, those you can get excited about. Grave Robbers are a little on the underwhelming side of decent.
Grave Robbers 53, downgraded from
6 to .Price
…But a better, more fitting flavor text would be “They’re dead! What do they need it for?” Also, not all grave robbers took only the jewelry.7
Anyway, I hope you can understand my confusion over the rarity of Grave Robbers. They do their vital work, keeping OP graveyard shenannygoats in check, and gaining you some incidental life in the process; nothing to get too excited about. The last two equivalencies, those you can get excited about. Grave Robbers are a little on the underwhelming side of decent.
{THIS, otoh, is just a straight up garbage fire!}
Hidden Path52; Boy, it’s getting exciting watching Standard and ClF3-bait going at it neck & neck!
Price
Would you believe there’s actually a colorshifted version of this card (from Homelands, because of course it’s from Homelands), and it too is on The List, because reasons?
You wanna know how to do this kind of effect right? Shadow Sliver. Half the mana, one quarter the color commitment, one third the rarity, same basic effect.
Hidden Path is kinda like Bloody Stupid Johnson’s hedge maze: the reason it’s so well hidden is because nobody in their right mind would ever even think to go looking for it (much less use it), it’s so terrible. And we gotta do this all over again when we get to Homelands! Yay!
Hidden Path
Price
Would you believe there’s actually a colorshifted version of this card (from Homelands, because of course it’s from Homelands), and it too is on The List, because reasons?
You wanna know how to do this kind of effect right? Shadow Sliver. Half the mana, one quarter the color commitment, one third the rarity, same basic effect.
Hidden Path is kinda like Bloody Stupid Johnson’s hedge maze: the reason it’s so well hidden is because nobody in their right mind would ever even think to go looking for it (much less use it), it’s so terrible. And we gotta do this all over again when we get to Homelands! Yay!
{Oh look, more utter trash just begging for a hypergolic reaction!}
Knights of Thorn53; banding is grounds for immediate strikethrough.
Price
If you think I’m being too harsh, Silver Knight says “Hi.” Even Tivadar of Thorn is a little bit terrible for being so narrow. You want a prot-red Knight, make a new friend.8
Knights of Thorn
Price
If you think I’m being too harsh, Silver Knight says “Hi.” Even Tivadar of Thorn is a little bit terrible for being so narrow. You want a prot-red Knight, make a new friend.8
{When Brood War came out, all the Use Map Settings modders & mapmakers swiftly put the new hotness units to excellent use}
Lurker 54, downgraded from6 to .
Price
Every 2/3 with cmc of 3 or less
’e looks a right lurker, doesn’e?
Let’s be honest, here. Blind Phantasm isn’t even moistening anybody’s granny panties, so a Blind Phantasm that’s a terrorist’s ancestor is still pretty meh. It’d make a somewhat decent Limited filler. But no way in hell is it a .
Lurker 54, downgraded from
6 to .Price
Every 2/3 with cmc of 3 or less
’e looks a right lurker, doesn’e?
Let’s be honest, here. Blind Phantasm isn’t even moistening anybody’s granny panties, so a Blind Phantasm that’s a terrorist’s ancestor is still pretty meh. It’d make a somewhat decent Limited filler
. But no way in hell is it a .{Dear gods, no!}
Mana Vortex54
Price
RepeatingLandDestruction in
! Why do we keep having to go over this shit? Wizards, what are you doing?! Where’s my N-Stoff?
Mana Vortex
Price
RepeatingLandDestruction in
! Why do we keep having to go over this shit? Wizards, what are you doing?! Where’s my N-Stoff?{The blood of the martyrs will water the meadows of France}
Martyr’s Cry 55
Price
See, THIS is how you do a low-mana mass-hate card! Martyr’s Cry is so much like Declaration in Stone, yet I wouldn’t be at all surprised to find that nobody who worked on Shadows over Innistrad block even remembered Martyr’s Cry, even with Burn at the Stake!
Teferi: Wrong Innistrad block.
Oops. Sorry. Martyr’s Cry is a useful card to reprint, especially in a Standard when White Weenie is running rampant & roughshod over the meta.
Martyr’s Cry 55
Price
See, THIS is how you do a low-mana mass-hate card! Martyr’s Cry is so much like Declaration in Stone, yet I wouldn’t be at all surprised to find that nobody who worked on Shadows over Innistrad block even remembered Martyr’s Cry, even with Burn at the Stake!
Teferi: Wrong Innistrad block.
Oops. Sorry. Martyr’s Cry is a useful card to reprint, especially in a Standard when White Weenie is running rampant & roughshod over the meta.
And that’s it for this week. I’m sure glad we could end it on a high note, especially since that high note also marks Standard reprints’ overtaking of
• 41 cards stay on The Reserved List
• 55 cards reprinted in Standard (with, in this issue, Exorcist & Grave Robbers downgraded from
to , and Lurker downgraded from to ).• 25 cards reprinted in supplemental sets.
•
• And Dark Ritual is still not going anywhere.
This gives us a BSQ of 135/176, or 76.7045% Aaaannd there goes my good feelings about ending on a high note!
Join us next week, where we’ll be finishing up with The
{Footnotes}
| 1 | Proliferate. |
| 2 | Does that count as one? |
| 3 | youtu.be/XJAjR3QgPVs?t=1m34s. |
| 4 | And now I want my faithful Commander readers to build me a deck that aims to get as many different types of counters on permanents and players as possible within the 100-card limit! |
| 5 | If the addition of counters was forced, and not a “may” ability, that might’ve made it fine, as well as being more interesting. |
| 6 | [Read in Erin Campbell’s most exasperated voice:] WHY?! Why was this printed as a rare? |
| 7 | Yo, Erin Campbell! Grafdigger’s Cages were apparently a real thing. |
| 8 | Even I think that’s a little oblique! Such is the life with tangential thinking. |
| 9 | #BullInAChinaShop |
